Original post : Oct 8, 2014

If you mean no say no - not yes!

Yes, no or maybe?Recent experiences have prompted me to search through the archives for a blog I wrote a couple of years ago about saying no. I'm so frustrated with having to chase suppliers who I think should be chasing me, the customer! My plea - if you don't want the business please stop wasting my time and yours and say NO!

Why can't people say no?

I don't believe people deliberately aim to waste my time - but that they prevaricate through some misguided sense that they are being nicer or kinder, or maybe they are really kidding themselves that they will fit the work in somewhere?

An old boss of mine used to refer all the sales calls he received to me: "You need to speak to Sharon. She makes those decisions. Here's her number." When they contacted me I knew that my most likely response would be, "Thanks but no thanks". I was open to their approach, would listen and give it fair consideration, but if there was no real opportunity or likelihood that we would give them any business then I would very openly, politely and straighforwardly tell them so.

Why couldn't my boss do this himself? He was an intelligent guy of high integrity, but he was terrible at turning people down. He wasn't really worried about hurting their feelings or not being liked, what he hated was closing down opportunities. He saw the possibilities in everything even when, according to my more pragmatic and realistic view of the world, resources were limited and you can't do everything. 

Time is precious - respect it!

If resources are limited in a big company like BT now, as a small business owner, they seem even more so - time in particular is a precious commodity. I am constantly dismayed, therefore, to find so many people who find it difficult to say no - or is it just me that suffers from this problem? (If so I need to know!)

I'm talking about people who don't return personal calls or emails, particularly if they disappear after they've taken a brief and have promised a proposal. I'm not talking about people who don't respond to direct marketing.

If I'm feeling charitable then I choose to believe that there are lots of people out there who are just like my old boss and who don't want to give up on an opportunity. On my less charitable days then I get angry about the lack of courtesy and respect that one business owner is prepared to show to another.

If you prepare a quote or a proposal for someone and they never get back to you what are you supposed to think?

  1. They are too busy?
  2. They are too scared to deliver bad news?
  3. They can't be bothered?
  4. They want you to work harder to get their business?

When we put a proposal together for a marketing programme it entails a lot of work researching the opportunity and tailoring the proposal. It is therefore a costly exercise. I know not all proposals are going to convert to business but getting feedback on why the prospective client is not interested in going ahead, where you failed to demonstrate the appropriate value, or how circumstances have changed is invaluable.

Feedback is vital

This is a marketing issue - we all need feedback in order to improve the standard of our services and then, hopefully, our conversion rates. 

It is good business practice to follow up submission of quotes or proposals but after how many unreturned emails or calls should I be getting the message (choose which message from 1-4 above)?

I genuinely believe that there are times when it is better to be cruel to be kind - to deliver the bad news to someone quickly and directly rather than keep them holding on, hoping, wishing and wondering!

My personal values (as those of you who know me will, I hope, testify) are to be honest and straightforward with people. I don't like to lead people on and, I know, this can come across as harsh at times. But why waste people's time? Let's be supportive to each other and show appropriate respect!


Sharon WildingSharon Wilding is a Chartered Marketer with many years experience in marketing for businesses large and small. As a lecturer and a practioner she aims to help small businesses use theory in practical ways to improve performance. You can connect with Sharon on Google+, LinkedIn, Facebook and Twitter.


Great article I could have written it myself but obviously not as well!
Comment by Neil Williams - Oct 9, 2014 17:49
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